Put the Shovel Back in the Shed

Well, I figure I'll start at the top of my list and work my way down. There will be plenty to talk about each week - trust.

Life Lesson #1 - Stop filling holes

Now this may seem a little contradictory - if something is empty then fill it - right? Mmm...not necessarily as it may not be meant to be filled. **crickets chirping** I can see the look on your face. Let me see if I can paint a picture and make it more clear.

Over time, we get some wear and tear. Just like those roads we drive down every day to get to work and to our daily activities. Inclement weather, temperature changes, chemicals, and the friction of traffic- everything plays a part in the condition of that road. Don't know about you, but there have been times where I've been driving to work, and out of no where a pot hole appears. Where did that come from? You swerve, you get to work and call the city's pothole hotline. They come out and fill it. Its fine for a while but sometimes that hole just gets bigger, or another one forms near by on the opposite side of the road. At some point, do you just keep filling the holes? Or do you just repave the entire length of the street? Or do you look at the root cause of the potholes and see if that can be fixed? Hmmm....

In relationships, we get marred and pocked just like a street with heavy traffic. Unfortunately, some of us have taken on more traffic than others - yeah you know what I'm talkin' about. **face smirked, side eye** We get hurt and that punches a hole in our very soul - in our very being. So, we look for a way to fill it. Now, whether that's with someone or someone(s), food, retail therapy...you see where I'm going. You fill the hole to stop the hurt. I get it...but you got to stop fillin' the holes and look at the bigger picture. If you keep fillin' it with those things then it may just get bigger or another one pop up somewhere else because you're not really satisfying your need. What's the root cause of the hole? You have to be willing to take a hard look at yourself and be willing to work on the whole you, not just the hole.

Been there, doing it now. I'm coming to realize that I cycle through my life's lessons every so often so its important for me to look back. I realize I need to put my shovel back in the shed, take a deep breath, step back and see why I pulled it out to begin with...



Now, all of the things I write are my life's lessons. I share so that maybe others can learn from what I've been through or seen. I don't have all the answers (well, maybe most...) but its something to ponder. I'm not a therapist and this is not intended to provide counseling or advice. Just someone who feels they've learned a thing or two.